Your Sex Takes Me To Paradise

Bruno Mars is a talented guy and seems like he has a blast performing. And then there’s this song:

“Your Sex Takes Me To Paradise.”

The song is obviously referring to sex outside of marriage. And it’s a little blasphemous; he sings, “I’m born again every time you spend the night.”

While a few years old, it catches the sexual ethos our day. When I hear it (it’s been on auto-play in my head for three days), the word “paradise” stands out in stark contrast to the word “sex.”

Paradise is a tall, tall order. Jesus called heaven “paradise,” knowing we’d all instantly picture a place of ultimate beauty and joy and perfection. It’s a “catch-all” word that brings to mind the perfect place in everyone’s mind (sociopath mind not included).

Soooo … sex equals paradise? Just for grins let’s see if sex lives up to the hype. And none of that biblical sex stuff – just society’s rule, which means “no rules!”

Easy one first: Weinstein. And every other guy like him. More like hell for the women.

Except, the folks horrified by him also scream “no rules” at any Nazi-fascist-Taliban-morality-cop that dares set boundaries. You know – like Mike Pence.

Not paradise.

Shack up sex: Apparently NOT paradise since shacking up before marriage skyrockets the probability of divorce. No Disney movie “happily ever after.”

Not paradise.

One night stands: If “paradise,” it wouldn’t be just one night. And it would be disease free.

The year 2016 was the BEST (meaning highest number) for new sexually transmitted disease rates (We’re No. 1!). Thirty years ago, I thought we’d be star trekking around the galaxy on skateboards. Instead, we’re just using technology to increase promiscuity and disease.

Not paradise.

Gender Bending: All the rage today, so it must be paradise! And from news/social media/Bruce Springsteen, you’d think at least 75 percent of the population must be bending. Actually, it’s less than one-third of 1 percent.

The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5) lists gender dysphoria as a mental disorder. And it has to be bad because transgendered people have an attempted suicide rate of up to 48 percent.

“That’s because of oppression!”

Really? How much more oppressed can you be than in chains? Yet at the height of slavery in this country, there was never any report of mass-suicide watches on plantations.

It’s actually quite easy to understand and sympathize with suicidal thoughts a person might have if he thinks he’s actually in the wrong body.

Not paradise.

Homosexuality: I’m a societal leper for even pointing this out since homosexuality is 100 percent celebrated in all media – and if you think gay marriage is wrong, Sen. Corey Booker is coming for you like a modern-day Joe McCarthy. Because he’s wiser than 5,000 years of religious history, Moses, God, and Jesus.

But a summary of the 2016 NHIS survey (a government study published by Journal of American Medicine) says homosexuals “were more likely to report impaired physical and mental health, heavy alcohol consumption, and heavy cigarette use.” You can read more here, but bottom line – across all categories for men and women, risks increase, some by almost 100 percent.

Not paradise.

LAST ONE and our BEST HOPE: PORN! No other human emotions involved, no disease spreading (for the observer anyway), and it can be enjoyed in the privacy of your own home! Paradise at last!

Except according to Psychology Today, you will experience INCREASED isolation, INCREASED chance of divorce, and get this: DECREASED sexual satisfaction! Porn makes the sexual paradise Not … As … “paradisey.”

Bottom line:

God created male and female and designed them, so they fit together like puzzle pieces and become a whole. Don’t believe in God? OK – then consider this: All of the above will be evolved out – because it’s all damaging to the species. Survival of the fittest and all that.

And there is proof that the biblical design is excellent:

Rolling Stone magazine article, “The Joy of No Sex”: In 1994, “the University of Chicago released the most authoritative survey to date on American sexual behavior and created the first tremor of the current Christian sexual liberation. According to the survey the most sexually satisfied people in the country are not S/M aficionados in New York or free love fanatics in San Francisco. The people getting the most joy, pleasure and ecstasy from sex are Christian women in monogamous marriages – they’re physically and emotionally more satisfied with their partners and are more likely to have an orgasm every time they have sex than are people of any other religion or of no religion at all.”

Boom. Mic drop.

Sex is awesome! And God made it so.

But even done God’s way, it’s still nowhere near paradise.

C.S. Lewis is better than I in so many ways, and he clarified the ocean of difference between this world and paradise this way:

“If we consider the unblushing promises of reward and the staggering nature of the rewards promised in the Gospels, it would seem that Our Lord finds our desires, not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.”

God made sex so fantastic, but what He has in store for all who worship Him will far outweigh anything we experience on this earth. Enjoy what He’s given! Often! But don’t confuse it with paradise – instead, let it remind you of His kindness and His promise that what is to come is infinitely better than anything you can ask for or imagine.

Amen amen.

-David

This piece originally appeared at World Net Daily here.

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It’s a Hell of a Revival!

The following was originally published by  World Net Daily here, and The Christian Post here.

As long as I can remember, everyone believes in heaven, but fewer believe in hell. If they do believe, it’s only those “other” bad folks going there – Hitler, Stalin, the neighbor who leaves the trashcans out all week. And before he left Christianity, Rob Bell (called a rock star pastor by Time) wrote a book, Love Wins, arguing that nobody goes to hell, because well…love wins (the phrase was quickly adopted for gay marriage, climate change, and Kim Jong-un).

But recently it seems to me that there is a “hell” of a revival going on-or more precisely a revival of hell. If Trump’s election has done anything, it’s gotten people to think about hell a lot and specifically who MUST go there!

I guess love DOESN’T win all the time.

Consider:

  1. Pennsylvania Assistant Principal Zachary Ruff told a pro-life student, “”You and Trump can go to hell,” and “You can go to hell, where they are, too,” “they” apparently referring to aborted children. I nominate Ruff to be the new head of Planned Parenthood! His values are perfectly aligned with Cecile Richards.

2. At the University of Utah, students protested conservative commentator Ben Shapiro’s appearance on campus with signs that said, Hate is not welcome here,” while they chanted (uneducated in hypocrisy), “It is right to rebel, Ben Shapiro go to hell.”

3. Rosie O’Donnell, in response to House Speaker Paul Ryan posting praise of Christmas and Jesus, said, “paul ryan – don’t talk about Jesus after what u just did to our nation – u will go straight to hell.”

4. Hamilton playwright Lin-Manuel Miranda, tweeted, “You’re going straight to hell, @realDonaldTrump. “No long lines for you.”

5. Shia LaBeouf, who I LOVE in Even Stevens and Transformers, told a cop that he’s “going to hell” because he’s black.

6. Donna Brazile told Hillary backing critics of her book to all “go to hell.”

7. Madeline Albright said to a laughing audience, that “there’s a special place in hell for women who don’t help each other.” Meaning any woman who doesn’t vote for Clinton. That Albright – she’s always cracking me up!

8. And lastly, White House Chief of Staff John Kelly, said that the California teacher who bashed the military while teaching “ought to go to hell”.”

Whoah! It’s like Nancy Pelosi’s Armageddon! Hell is everywhere! We’ve gone from “love wins” to “who am I gonna send to hell today?” so quickly!

And you might expect that from insane Christian-in-name-only types (Westboro Baptist Church), but the vast majority of the hell talk seems to be coming from the Christianity-is-the-Taliban left.

Why all the hell talk?

Simple. Because every culture and every people have a sense that justice is real and wrongs must be righted. People may have vastly different views on what is right and is wrong. I.e., Pro-lifers: abortion bad. Most pro-abortion activists? Save the whales! Abort the baby! But all have an innate sense that justice must prevail. Why?

Because we are created in God’s image. He is a God of justice. He will right the wrongs. So even if our sense of wrong is corrupted by sin, like God, we still have that innate craving that wrongs should be righted.

All of that said, here two things you’ve gotta know about hell:

1. Hell is real. Jesus talked more about hell than He did about heaven. If you believe Jesus is divine, no getting around hell. Jesus is right; Rob Bell is wrong.

Justice demands all wrong must be punished. But it doesn’t happen on this earth! Only 61% of murders are solved. That means there are murderers who never face justice in this life. So how can justice prevail?

God is a just God. And He will punish all wrongdoing. Nobody, “get’s away with it.” And according to Jesus, hell is the place just punishment takes place.

2. God doesn’t want anyone to go there. Every religion but Christianity says the way to erase our bad is to do lots of good, and the good will outweigh the bad. But even if you could do a truly excellent thing for every sin you’ve ever committed, it wouldn’t erase the sin. So, what to do?

Jesus went to a cross and took all the sin – took our “just” punishment, so we wouldn’t have to.

Damnation used to mean punishment in hell. So to say, “Damn you!” meant, “Go to hell!”

I had a clever seminary professor, and about 30 or 40 years ago, when speaking to teens, he’d say, “Some of you love to say, ‘Damn you! (when a preacher says that it wakes everyone up). Quit that! You can’t damn anyone. So, some of you say, ‘God damn you.’ You need to quit that too. Because God doesn’t want to damn them. He wants to save them.

I’d add, “No matter what Rosie says!”

So for the Rosies and the Shias and the Lin-Manuels – I hope you do believe in hell. But be assured, you can’t send anyone there, and God doesn’t want to send anyone there, even you. That’s why He paid such a ridiculously high price to keep folks out.  Max Lucado says it best: “Jesus places ‘do not enter signs’ all over the gateway to hell, and he announces to anyone who wants to go, ‘if you go you’ve gotta go over my dead body.’”

Amen amen.

 

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Do Dogs Go To Heaven? How About Cats?

I actually wrote this many years ago, but an excellent dog rescuing friend had a dog die recently, and it reminded me how important this question can be for some.

But before I get to the most important question, I must dispense with some other items (warning: skip below for the answer if you’re allergic to cat-bashing).

Do cats go to heaven? 

The stuff of nightmares this beast is.

Of course not. That’s like asking if the serpent in the garden (Genesis 3) went to heaven. Cats are a result of the fall. In fact, I’d go so far as to suggest that there were no cats in the Garden of Eden. It wouldn’t be paradise if there were cats there. 

Am I making this up as I go along? Absolutely.

Charles Portis, in one of my favorite books, True Grit, said it this way, through his character Mattie Ross:

“I have known some horses and a good many more pigs who I believe harbored evil intent in their hearts. I will go further and say all cats are wicked, though often useful. Who has not seen Satan in their sly faces? Some preachers will say, well, that is superstitious “claptrap.” My answer is this: Preacher, go to your Bible and read Luke 8: 26-33.”

Truer words were never spoken.

Brrrrrrr. Scary…

But enough of this silliness!

If you have a cat, I love you too. And you can replace “dog” with “cat” throughout the remainder of this post because I have no authority (Biblical or otherwise) upon which to rest my cat opinions.

So on to the main question! Do dogs go to heaven?

1. The Bible doesn’t say they do. The Bible doesn’t say they don’t. So no one can answer with certainty. If someone speaks with certainty on this issue, quit listening. They are puffed up and full of themselves.

2. There will definitely be animals in heaven. See Ezekiel 47:9.

3. Billy Graham’s answer (it’s a great one): In response to a little girl who asked this question, he is purported to have said: “If that’s what it takes for you to be happy in heaven, God will make sure your dog is in heaven.”

Excellent answer! Takes #1 into account. And speaks the very essence of God’s loving description of heaven – a place of no pain, no suffering, no sorrow (Rev. 21:4). Heaven is a place that Jesus called “paradise” – knowing what that word would mean to us.

4. Joni Eareckson Tada (a woman who takes the promises of God very seriously), wrote the best answer of all time (in my estimation):

 “If God brings pets back to life, it wouldn’t surprise me. It would be just like Him. It would be totally in keeping with His generous character….Exorbitant. Excessive. Extravagant grace after grace. Of all the dazzling discoveries and ecstatic pleasures heaven will hold for us, the potential to see Scrappy would be pure whimsy-utterly, joyfully, surprisingly superfluous. It’s not that animals have souls or that God owes Scrappy anything, but heaven is going be a place that will refract and reflect in as many ways as possible the joy of our Great God, who delights in lavishing love on His children.” (from God of All Creation by James Robison)

That answer gives me high hopes. I’ve had some great dogs that I loved dearly. Great dogs that I cried over when I lost them.

I must admit that for years, I thought this was a stupid, stupid question. But as I’ve grown older, and a little (teeny tiny bit) wiser through experience, I must admit – it’s a good question.

God blesses us with every good thing-James 1:17. And for many, pets have been a most excellent thing. They’ve been gifts from God that have blessed us, been loyal, and been a source of great friendship, comfort, and love, in times of great need.

Will your dog be in heaven? I can say this with absolute certainty: the God who loves you extravagantly will see to it that your pet will be there if that’s what you need for heaven to be paradise. And I agree with Joni – it would be just like our God to have your pet there.

Be blessed. I happen to know that your heavenly Father is quite fond of you. 

David

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